"Yog hais tias ib tug txiv neej tsis sib ntaus rau kev hlub, ces tsis nyiam," psychology

Peb txhua tus siv rau qhov tseeb hais tias ib tug txiv neej yog ib tug txiv neej, ib tug predator uas npaj txhij ua ib yam dab tsi kom tau lub siab xav tau - kom maj mus ua rog nrog tus neeg sib tw, piv txwv. Cov niam tsev thiab niam tais tau qhia thiab qhia peb tias qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws hauv tsev neeg yuav tsum yog ib tug txiv neej, tias tsev neeg tsis muaj peev xwm tsa tsis tau nrog poj niam thiab tus ntxhais yuav tsum tsis txhob "khiav" dhau ib tug tub hluas, txawm tias nws tsis nyiam nrog nws. Tab sis ib tug tub hluas tsuas yog kom tau ib tug ntxhais, saib xyuas nws thiab ua txhua yam los xyuas kom meej tias nws xaiv tau ib tug xav tias nws txawv thiab txawv rau nws. Tsis tas li ntawd, qhov no yog qhov uas nws xaiv tau, raws li cov kev qhia ntawm cov laus dua, nws lub khawm thaum nws xav tau, thiab tus txiv neej yuav tsum tau ua tib lub sij hawm uas nws nyiam. Yog hais tias, vim li cas, nws tsis kam ua li no, nws yuav tsum tam sim ntawd yuav tsum tau deev tus neeg, betrayer thiab unworthy ntawm tus poj niam txoj kev hlub. Zoo, yog hais tias dheev qhov tsis muaj hmoo, tus self-administered "tus ntxhais huabtais" tuaj txog, ces tus txiv neej tiag tiag yuav tsum to taub txhua yam, zam txim thiab ua ntej mus rau reconciliation. Nws zoo li ib tug txiv neej lub rooj ntawv ntawm lub xyoo pua puv 19, txoj cai? Hmoov tsis, peb cov niam thiab niam tais zoo li zoo nkauj me ntsis hauv peb lub hnub nyoog loj hlob hauv kev sib hlub. Thiab txawm hais tias cov ntxhais hauv lub xyoo dhau los hauv kev hlub teeb meem muaj me ntsis yooj yim, lawv cov kev qhia rau tus cwj pwm tsis nyob rau hauv tag nrho haum rau peb. Thiab yog li ntawd, yog tias koj ntsib cov lus nug "yog tias ib tug txiv neej tsis sib ntaus rau kev hlub, ces tsis nyiam" , kev xav ntawm cov txiv neej yuav tsum nyiam koj hauv thawj qhov chaw. Cia peb sim nkag siab ua ke li cas qhov kev txiav txim siab no yog nyob rau hauv peb qhov kev ua tau zoo, kev siv cuab yeej hluav taws xob thiab tsis tshua muaj hnub nyoog kiag.

Yog li, koj yog ib tug ntxhais niaj hnub, ntseeg koj tus kheej, tiam sis nrog cov kab lus - " yog tias ib tug txiv neej tsis sib ntaus rau kev hlub, ces tsis nyiam," koj lub siab puas humbly inclined thiab paub qhov tseeb ntawm kab lus no. Dab tsi ces? Thiab koj tus kheej tuaj yeem piav qhia txog dab tsi nws txhais tau hais tias "sib ntaus sib tua rau kev hlub"? Tej zaum koj yuav sib xyaw ntawm ob tus kiv cua, thiab koj tsis to taub yog vim li cas lawv tsis sib tham rau ib tus duel, lawv tsis pub koj tuaj ntsib peb, kom koj txiav txim siab thiab teb cov lus kawg, tsis tau ntsib koj niam koj txiv kom tau lawv qhov chaw? Los yog ntawm no yog qhov piv txwv tsis tseem ceeb: koj sib sib zog nrog koj tus neeg koj hlub, thiab nws rov mus rau txoj kev, txiav txim siab tias nws zoo dua rau koj dua ua ib yam dab tsi koj tus kheej thiab tsim teeb meem ntxiv rau koj tus kheej. Thiab koj, tom qab sib tham, piv txwv li, nrog koj niam, tuaj rau qhov xaus tias yog ib tug txiv neej tsis sib ntaus rau kev hlub, ces nws tsis nyiam , kev xav ntawm kev sib raug zoo yog ib yam tseem ceeb, tab sis nws inevitably ua rau koj qee cov lus txiav txim. Ua kom koj muaj kev zoo siab yuav yog thawj zaug, tab sis nrog lwm tus khub, hu cov lus qub thiab tsis txaus siab txog nws rau txhua tus neeg uas muaj peev xwm. Tab sis koj puas ua qhov yog? Tom qab ua raws li cov tswv yim no thiab ib txoj kev npaj ua, koj tuaj yeem nrog koj lub taub ntswg, vim tias cov txiv neej muaj kev vuab tsuab, alas, ib qho chaw. Yog li xav txog koj cov yeeb yam. Nco ntsoov cov poj niam zoo nkauj thiab lawv txoj kev sib raug zoo rau cov txiv neej. Piv txwv li, qhov hais ntawm ib qho ntawm kuv nyiam actresses, Grace Kelly: "Ib tug txiv neej los ntawm qhov yog tub nkeeg. Yog tias tag nrho cov poj niam muaj ib txoj hauj lwm, cov txiv neej yuav zaum hauv lub tsev haus dej hauv lub tsev thiab ntsia hauv TV, "los yog ib nqe lus cuam tshuam los ntawm ib tug actress, screenwriter thiab sau ntawv hauv ib tug neeg, Bette Davis:" Cov poj niam muaj zog tsuas yog cov neeg tsis muaj zog. " Thiab cov no yog cov poj niam ntawm xyoo pua 20th! Yog li ntawd, yog tias koj xav tias yuav tsum muaj ib yam dab tsi uas ua los ntawm ib tug txiv neej ib leeg, ces koj yuam kev heev. Kev sib raug zoo yog tsim los ntawm ob tug neeg, thiab nws tsis muaj peev xwm cia ib tug neeg nyob rau hauv tus txheej txheem rau hauv tus txheej txheem, xws li zaum ntawm hauv av nrog folded caj npab. Yog tias koj xav tau ib tug txiv neej, yog tias koj hlub nws tiag tiag, ces koj yuav ua txhua yam los ua koj tus hlub. Zoo, yog tias koj npaj txhij zaum rau ib lub pob ntawm lub chips hauv TV thiab tos nws mus hu, tab sis tsis txhob hu ua ntej vim koj muaj "muaj nuj nqis," ces kuv xav kom koj ua siab ntev thiab Tshuag li chips rau ntau xyoo ... onwards.

Koj paub, thaum kuv sau cov ntawv zoo li no, kuv xav hais txog qhov tseeb tias peb cov poj niam hauv tiam 21st century, tsis txaus siab txog qhov uas peb tawm tsam hauv 19-rau qhov peb tiv thaiv, thiab khiav mus rau hauv. Peb xav kom muaj kev ywj pheej ntawm cov txiv neej - peb raug kev txom nyem los ntawm qhov tseeb hais tias peb tsis muaj kev mloog lus, peb xav hnav ris tsho zoo nkauj - tam sim no peb hnav zoo nkauj lingerie, thiaj li tsuas yog txiv neej xav peb, lawv xav ua haujlwm - tam sim no peb tab tom tu siab tias peb "plow like horses" ntxiv. Ob centuries rau keeb kwm - pshik, thiab ntau heev tau hloov. Lub ntiaj teb pom kev ntawm ib tug txiv neej kuj tau ua ib qho kev zam. Peb xav txog tus txiv neej zoo li, leej twg, raws li koj xav, tsis tua kev hlub?

Txhua tus txiv neej yuav tsum muaj ib yam dab tsi. Vim lawv yog cov txiv neej. Tsob ntoo tsob ntoo-yuav tsum, tsa ib tug tub-yuav tsum ua, tsim lub tsev-yuav tsum, npaj tsev neeg-yuav tsum, pab tus niam-yuav tsum, sib ntaus rau kev hlub-yuav tsum ua, thiab hais txog thiab nyob rau thiab. Qhov no yog rau peb, cov ntxhais, ntau npaum li cas yog kev zam txim thiab tso cai. Peb muaj peev xwm ncuav tau ib tug txiv neej, thiab peb yuav tsis muaj dab tsi rau nws. Tab sis yog hais tias ib tug txiv neej slaps ib tug poj niam, qhov no tsis ntxiv rau nws hwm.

Tab sis peb tiv thaiv kev vaj huam sib luag ntawm cov txiv neej thiab cov poj niam, uas txhais tau hais tias nws tau ua rau cov txiv neej yuav me ntsis qis zog, me ntsis tsis nco qab, me ntsis ntxiv. Tus poj niam yuav tsis yog ib qhov luag nyav yog tias thawj tus neeg yuav xaiv ib lub hnub, thawj zaug yuav rov qab los sib kho dua, thawj tus neeg yuav tau sib yuav, thawj yuav hnia. Peb txoj kev khav txiv yog qhov tsis muaj nuj nqis, thaum peb pom li cas tus txiv neej saib peb, nws qhia tau nws txoj kev xav li cas. Tab sis mus sib ceg hais tias nws "tsis sib ntaus rau kev hlub" vim hais tias nyob rau hauv qee qhov teeb meem tsis ua raws li peb xav, nws tsis tsim nyog nws. Peb yuav ua rau kom txhua yam siab. Xav tias, vim nws ua li cas rau koj, dhau lawm, nws yog ib qho kev tawm tsam ntawm nws tus kheej. Yog hais tias koj tsis nyiam ntawd hauv qee qhov taw qhia nws tsis qhia qhov pib, tsis ua dab tsi, ces cia li sib tham nrog nws. Muaj tseeb koj tus txiv neej muaj ib qho kev thov txim. Los ntawm tib qho xwm txheej, tag nrho cov neeg sib txawv, thiab yog tias qhov teeb meem uas koj tus hluas nraug tsis rov qab rau thawj zaug, ces tej zaum qhov teeb meem nyob hauv nws tus cwj pwm, thiab tsis nyob rau hauv nws tus kheej, thiab txiav txim siab rau koj tus kheej seb koj puas txaus siab no lub xeev ntawm affairs, los yog tsis. Tus txiv neej hlub kev nplij siab, thiab yog tias koj saib koj tus hlub, ces qee zaum mus rau nws rau concessions. Hmoov zoo!